I knew going into this whole having a baby thing that there would be times I would be grossed out. I received plenty of warning about the inordinate amount of bodily fluids that manage to come out of someone less than two feet tall.
I had heard about the poop, the pee, the spit up. I knew that I should embrace crusty graham crackers and rice cereal as my new perfume. But I feel I was completely and utterly unprepared for boogers.
I find boogers to be the grossest of all.
From just a couple weeks old, Little Spaghetti has been a stuffy little boy. (I blame his father with all his allergies and what not). So I often need to clean out the little guy's nose so he can breathe and eat (you know, the little things in life...). I am never too far from a bottle of saline solution and a trusty bulb syringe.
But man, is it gross. Long, green, slimy boogers. Unbelievably gross. My stomach has never turned at poop - even as we've started solids (though I reserve the right to rescind this statement since I know we still have a ways to go).
But, for the first time in my mommy life, I gagged. At a booger.
We were taking a bath (it seems that a lot of my stories start this way these days...) and Little Spaghetti was chasing his squirty sea animals around. He likes to try to catch them with his mouth. This caused him to dip his little face just a little too far into the water, and his nose went underwater just for a brief second. He came up surprised - as he tends to do - but otherwise fine.
The thing that these short face-dips into the water will almost always do, though, is clean out this boy's nose. Sure enough, shortly after, he started snuffing and rubbing his nose, and all the sudden, attached to his hand, came out this big, long, gray booger from deep in the recesses of his sinus canals. Before I could call for reinforcements (aka Mr. Spaghetti to get me a tissue), he plunged his hand into the water and washed the booger away.
There we were, sitting in the bath while I screamed like a little girl for my husband to GET THE FREAKIN' TISSUE, all the while this horrid, slimy booger was floating around in the water with us. And that's when I gagged. Watching it float along wistfully in the bathwater was just too much.
And, in the interest of honest, I must tell you that I gagged for the second time in my mommy life. Just now. As I wrote about that disgusting booger experience.