Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Speaking of fear...

I mentioned in my last post how fed up I am with all the fear that comes along with pregnancy, birth, and parenthood. I remember telling a good friend of mine when I was pregnant the first time, "There are so many decisions to make about everything, and it seems like the consequence of every decision no matter which way you choose is that your baby is going to die."

That might be a little extreme. Just a little. But it sure felt that way sometimes, particularly when I was considering a homebirth last time (more on that to come later).

So, anyway, this weekend, I was looking on Craigslist for a baby swing.  It's something I hate to buy brand new because they get used for such a short amount of time.  I found one that was only 25 bucks and had a cute little barnyard theme, so I emailed the gal who was selling it to ask if it was battery powered or had the option to plug it into the wall.  To be honest, for $25, I probably would have bought it either way because while I do remember feeling like I should have bought stock in Duracell when Little Spaghetti was a newborn, that stage just doesn't last long enough for it to really matter.

But then, she emailed back.  I was in a bad mood anyway, and I probably overreacted to something that was entirely harmless.  She said, "Just batteries.  No cords for baby to choke on."

And I lost it, folks.  Not to her, of course, because I hate confrontation.  But in the privacy of my own bedroom, in my mind, it went something like this:  "Seriously! Who does this woman think she is? I ask a simple question about her swing, and she thinks I need a lecture on baby safety?? Because babies never survive having to use a swing that plugs into the wall.  And because everybody knows that the instant you have a baby, you are required to get rid of all the cords in your entire house and live like the Amish. My newborn will obviously have a future as a gymnast if she can manage to twist herself out of the swing buckles and get to the cord on the back of the damn swing..."

Was she actually lecturing me? Probably not. She was just trying to sell her swing and make a little cash.  But the point remains the same: people are not ashamed to take any opportunity to point out the potential threats to your baby's health and safety in order to get what they want from you. 

And, if you want to get technical, I'm pretty sure the biggest safety threat with cords is strangulation or electrocution anyway, not choking.  Take that, Safety Monitor Craigslist Lady.

For better or worse, I think I should warn you that I've entered the whiny stage of pregnancy.  The whiny stage of pregnancy also happens to coincide with the naked stage of pregnancy.  Ok, not fully naked.  But definitely the point where I can no longer handle a shirt constantly riding up and elastic-waist jeans constantly riding down, so I am guaranteed to not be wearing one or the other any time I don't have to.  Luckily, you don't have to experience that with me.  The whining on the other hand...I'll try to keep my ranting to a minimum, but I make no guarantees.


  1. I don't mind reading your rants because they're always interesting, sorry to hear you're going through some fears though Lisa, everything will be okay.

  2. I hadn't actually realized how little time (that sounds weird but I'm going with it) we would be using our swing. Avi will be four months tomorrow (woah!) and I'm thinking she's already almost too big for it. When she falls asleep she tips forward and I swear she's going knock the thing over. Not to mention that she's so heavy that I have to have the swing on the highest setting to do anything.